The Hunt for Savings

When I grew up, my father managed a cattle ranch, in New England. Like many "ranches" in New England in the 80's and 90's, this was, at heart, a tax write-off for someone with too much money.

The "someone with too much money," in this case, was two brothers, who owned a successful business and then owned the cattle ranch. They were older, they were not raised on a ranch, but they enjoyed "working" on the ranch. Despite being the person who signed the paychecks, they would do anything, and they were smart enough to know that, since they were not actually ranch-hands, they needed to bow to the experience and knowledge of their employees. This meant they spent a lot of time on pretty "low-level" projects - painting, raking, running to the store.

It was a bit of joke, for much of my childhood, that is these two brothers got a bit too underfoot, we could send them to the store and they would be gone all day. This is because, send them out for a roll of masking tape, and they would go to every store in a 20 mile radius that might possibly have masking tape, and check prices. They would haggle if needed, and, nine times out of ten, they would return with a case of masking tape, not a roll, because it was "such a good deal."

They didn't need to save the 29 cents, I assure you. Nor were they just trying to slack off and avoid coming back to the ranch. They were, quite simply, hunting for savings. They believed that you needed to get the best deal on every item, and they were proud to get a bargain.

They didn't NEED the bargain. They wanted it.

At my most broke moments, I often had these "out-of-body" experiences, where I could SEE that I needed to be more like them, but I could never control myself enough to make myself do it.

You see, when you are broke, the last thing you want to do is look for a bargain. Haggle? Oh no, "I don't want them to think I can't afford it." Go to the store that has the masking tape 29 cents cheaper? Absurd! "I am so broke that what is another 29 cents?"

I had items to be returned that I didn't want to return because the cashier would surely think I was being silly wasting my time for $10. Nevermind that I could have eaten for several days on that $10.

Eventually, I got better at pointing out when an item rang up incorrectly, or returning items that I didn't want or need.

It wasn't until after I was out of debt, and actually putting quite a bit of money into savings each month, that I was willing to post items to Craigslist to sell. Mainly items I had held on to throughout being broke.

I look at the grocery store ads each week and take advantage of price matching to get the lowest prices without actually driving all over town. Using coupons and looking at ads was something else I didn't do until long after I was out of debt.

Currently, I am on month four in a standoff with the hospital over a $5.98 charge for something that never happened. (They want to charge me for having blood taken, but no blood was taken. No blood work was done. No blood work was ordered. I refuse to pay. Purely on principal.)

I've never gotten comfortable, though, at haggling just for the fun of it.

I live with a man who will research every purchase to death, watching the price for sales or discounts, reading reviews and comparing products. He will go to the store to look at/touch/ fiddle with every piece of electronic equipment and every tool 15 times before he purchases it. He has been shopping for a new used bicycle for at least 18 months, without every purchasing anything. Not because he doesn't want it, but he knows exactly what he wants, and he knows exactly how much its worth, and he wants to spend about 40% less then what its worth! So he will wait.

I can't do that. I can talk myself OUT of buying something. That part is easy. I can now buy something, feel guilty and return it. I can tell myself I don't "need" something and refuse to learn anything about it.

As I learn to act like an unbroke person, as I learn that I can once again afford pickles, I think back to the two owners of the farm, and their all-day journey for masking tape. When I am on the phone with the hospital for my monthly explanation as to why I am not paying $5.98 for something that didn't happen, I have a feeling they are smiling down at me.