Slow Day At Work

It's that time of year when so many companies close down for a week or two that even companies that ARE open don't call because they assume everyone else is closed.

This makes for a very slow week in customer service.

On the one hand, this makes for a nice change. Normally, my office is quite busy, and I am taking phone calls, reading faxes and emails, and trying to work up pricing from a catalog, all simultaneously.

Normal days, busy days, seem to fly by. Every time you look at the clock, an hour or two has gone by and you're wondering how you will get every thing done. So you concentrate a little harder, multi-task a little more efficiently, and somehow you're usually caught up about 30 minutes before closing.

So, having a day to straighten out your catalogs, dust off your computer or change your calendar is nice. A much-needed mental break.

On the other hand, its a bit of a problem. Not because I can't handle eight hours of boredom. There are so many stories bouncing around in my head that I spend a solid five hours talking to myself on a slow day like today!

No, the problem is, on a slow week, on slow day number three, I've brought a book to the office. I'm all caught up and I only have about fifteen minutes of work in the morning and then I settle in with my book and I start reading. For two hours I read uninterrupted.

Then, the phone rang. A customer, with a fairly simple request, that required me to make another phone call, do a bit of math and then call them back. On a normal day, I would be grateful for the easy task and take care of it in between multiple other items. However, after two hours of doing nothing, this task seemed unfairly difficult. "Why do I get the phone call that requires math? No one else has had phone calls like this today...."

And when a colleague called me to check-in, I was completely incapable of talking to him while doing the other task....and couldn't convince myself that it was okay to stop working on the task for five minutes. . . I still had six long hours stretching out ahead of me to get it done!

Somehow slow days make me completely unproductive.

Being broke is a lot like being busy at work, for me.

Discovering I was broke was like getting hired on at this job. I had a million things to do and learn and was up all night on message boards and reading blogs and running to the library for every debt book I could find. I never tired of the topic, never got bored with the topic, and somehow, just when I thought I couldn't stand drowning in my debt for one more month, the payments were complete and there was the end of the tunnel and...ahh.

Being out of debt is about like a slow day. You start relaxing. You get other hobbies. You decide to try the $60 hair cut instead of the $6 hair cut. You buy some new clothes, pay to wash your car. You're not doing anything crazy. Not putting yourself in debt. You're just sort of. . .floating along.

But then comes that call. A leaking intake manifold gasket leak on your car. A medical bill, or two or four. Nothing huge, in fact, you actually have the cash in your savings account to handle the bill. But somehow after floating along this bump is tremendous!

I must get this medical bill paid right away and get the money back into savings because who knows what will happen!! Something is wrong with my car? My car?!? Do I need a new car? Can I really afford this repair? What if I go to the cheapest repair shop and they don't really fix it?!?

I've recently paid off my medical bills. Again. It has me breathing this sigh of relief just as deeply as if I was just making the last payment on my car. But the thing is, I had the money all along to pay ALL of my medical bill. . . I just spread it out to pay it from my HSA, rather then paying it from savings and reimbursing myself.


Today was a slow day at work. And it was a nice reminder to enjoy the downtime, take advantage of it, but make sure you're really caught up and prepared for the busy times.

Switch and save up to 1 million dollars!

Are you paying too much for car insurance?

You could be paying too much for car insurance.

Have you had your car insurance quoted recently?

Exactly WHO is the "average driver" that every single car insurance company is using as their example?!?!?

OK, first of all, I am one of those people who generally would shop around a bit for car insurance, and who's most important feature of car insurance was the rate.

So when I see on the commercial that someone is going to SAVE $853 per year on auto insurance for switching, I twitch a little. I do. I haven't PAID $853 a year in auto insurance since I was a) under 25, and b) living in Massachusetts!

Despite my bankruptcy, I had my insurance down to about $50/month, or $600 per year, and most years a brought it down a few more dollars. . .especially as my job and commutes have changed and I drive fewer and fewer annual miles.

Then, a little over a year ago, we came out to the car one morning and couldn't open the driver side door. Upon closer inspection, that would be because the driver side had been backed into. By someone with a bike rack on the back of their vehicle.

Argh.

I didn't think about it, but called my insurance and entered my claim. I brought my vehicle to the shop they told me to and I forked over my high-deductible (for lower annual rates!). My vehicle was fixed, I could once again get in from the driver side and we all went on our merry ways.

Until three months later when it was time for my policy renewal, and my policy was nearly DOUBLED!

Shopping around, however, got me nowhere, thanks to my recent claim combined with that big red "bankruptcy" that shows on my credit report.

It sent me into a bit of a number-crunching, flash-backs to being broke flurry, but after a few days I decided it was time to give up comprehensive and collision. There was no deductible high enough to get my annual rate lowered to where I wanted it.

Most importantly, should my car be in another accident, I knew I had the money set aside to at least get another car that could get me the two miles to work each day.

I shopped around with my new plan of getting only the least auto insurance legally allowed, and discovered that my current provider was still my best option.

Another year has gone by. I am now over one year without a claim, one year farther away from a bankruptcy, and I was not at all concerned about my auto insurance bill coming due.

Then the bill came. It is a 14% increase over last year.

So I spent much of the evening researching and collecting auto insurance quotes and, sadly, it is still the best deal out there.

But the reason I am really annoyed enough to write this here is I used NetQuote, and I basically was brought to a screen where there were NINE auto insurance companies listed, and every single one of them told me that if I switched to them I would save "XXX" amount. And in all nine cases, XXX was more then I currently pay!

Exactly WHO Is the person who hasn't switched their insurance in SO long they are paying this much?!?! And why can't I meet them, and take control of their finances, and pocket anything I save them??

Get A Life. Or at least, a hobby

"The trouble with being poor is it takes up all of your time." - Willem de Kooning

There was a time that my life was full.

Full of bills and payments and juggling numbers and crunching numbers and planning how I was going to make it all work and figuring out what life would be like after I dug myself out of this hole and planning a budget and reworking the budget and then reworking it again.

I kept a small box on my kitchen counter, and in that box, I kept my checkbook, a calculator, a pen and pencil, a book of stamps, incoming bills and my most recent credit card statement, and a tiny notebook.

On the pages of that tiny notebook were my budgets. Yearly budget, monthly budget, weekly budget. I tracked how much I spent on each bill each month and noted my running average. I juggled numbers and each juggling act had its own piece of paper.

"If I cancel cable and Internet and my cell phone and spend only $50 per month on food, then I will have that loan paid off in only X months, but if I keep my cell phone . . . ."

"If I switch jobs and make $3 more an hour, and I put that money toward my car payment. . ."

Every evening I would come home, fix myself a little something to eat, and bring my box with me to the couch. I would look at my checkbook. I would look at my credit card statements. I would check the due dates of the bills. I would write myself a few notes.

I can't even remember what all I did, but I know that it took up every evening. And weekend.

In fact, I once remember I had been on a date, and the next night we were chatting on the phone and he asked what I was doing that evening, and I said "balancing my checkbook." A few days later, he asked the same question, got the same answer, and didn't fully believe me. Apparently he thought "balancing my checkbook" was the modern day equivalent of "washing my hair." Which allowed me to recognize exactly how much time was dedicated to being broke, even if it didn't actually change my priorities.

After I got out of debt, I had to wean myself back in to having a life. Into having hobbies.

The art museum is free on Saturday mornings. The pile of unfinished craft projects can always whittle away an afternoon. Joining the book club offered through the library lets me read books I would never choose on my own, and spend some time around other people without actually spending any money at all.

This blog is me telling myself to write again, something I used to enjoy, but stopped. First I was busy balancing the checkbook, then I really did give up the Internet, then I really didn't have anything nice to say.

I'm trying not to set too many "resolutions" for 2011, since I feel like I am already setting myself on the path I want to be on, but if there was one, it would be to continue to remind myself of the things that I enjoy. The things I still say, "Oh, I love to....." then pause and remember I haven't actually DONE that activity in five years.

Finding Teammates

A few years ago I had an at-home business selling make-up.

Despite being an adequate saleswoman, this was a laughable business for me, since wearing make-up and pantyhose (required by my business) are not my strong suits. I quickly cut back on the parties and personal sales, and started work as an in-home office assistant for more successful saleswomen.

I worked in the home offices of three different women, all married, all employed solely by the make-up business. Two of these women had children of their own and one did not.

I organized their offices, kept their books, stuck their address labels on the little tubes of make-up, and even cleaned their cars and cleaned out their purses. Whatever was needed.

One of these women was making six-figures a year, had just completed construction of her dream home and was the epitome of success. One of these women was just as in debt as I was at the time, and making little more then I did. The third was somewhere in the middle.

All these women were receiving the same message from their corporate office, so I heard that same message three times over!

Corporate directed women to value their time. To "consider their family." If you can make $50 per hour at a make-up party, shouldn't you attend as many make-up parties as you can?
Hire a nanny, hire a maid, hire a cook: Whatever you need to do, because your time is worth more then what you would pay someone to do your laundry.

Which is why a woman who barely made more then I did would pay me to take her car to the car wash, rinse it off, and throw away her gum wrappers from the ashtray.

Being single at the time, not to mention really, really broke, I never understood the message, on any level.
I was doing my laundry at the laundromat, and it didn't take that long if you hit it at the correct time, and I could usually balance my checkbook AND write out my grocery list while the washers were going. (While the dryers were going I would walk next door to the library for a bit.)
Meal planning when you're single and broke is not difficult at all, and I never considered my apartment "messy" because everything would be exactly where I left it -- which must be where I want it.

A few years have passed, I've been bankrupt and broke and unbroke. After many years of being single, I now live with a man, and, although we don't have kids, I get now why those women would consider hiring out the most basic tasks.

Is it that much harder to cook for two then it is for one? Of course not. But the amount of time I spend, as a woman, thinking "Would he like it if I made this for dinner? Or would he prefer if we had that? I should go to the store to get this item to go with that item I bought last weekend." more than quadruples my meal preparation time.

Is laundry that much harder for two then it is for one? Of course not. But sorting someone else's clothes, remembering what he hangs up versus what he folds....well, it all takes a lot more time then my tried and true "leave it in the dryer until you need it" method.

Is it that much harder to clean a house when two people live in it? Well, the answer could be yes, but, luckily for me, the answer is no. However, I spend more time picking up the book off the coffee table at the end of the evening, just to grab it again the next day, then I ever did at home. We both spend time looking for remotes and car keys then we did before. Shoes always get tucked away, whereas as a single girl they blocked the door.

So I understand, in part, why these women thought they needed some help. A team, if you will, so they could turn things over and focus on what was important.

Lately, I even understand what its like to be busy, and how being in a relationship just adds to the busyness.

Currently, I wake up at 4:45am and I am out the door by 5:15am. I head straight to the gym, then head to the office. After work, I head back to the gym at least three nights a week, generally getting home by 6pm. In order to be up the next morning at 4:45am, I give myself three and a half hours before I should be in bed.

In those scant 210 minutes, I have to unpack my bags from the day and repack with them with an outfit for the next day; pack lunch, breakfast and two snacks for both of us; lay out my gym clothes for morning; make and eat dinner; write a blog post if I have something to say; check e-mails, facebook, the mail, voicemail, smoke signals...well, you get the idea. In addition, there's dishes to be washed, laundry to be done, a phone and an iPod to be charged. At some point I like to actually read the book for my monthly book club meetings. Toss in looking at the grocery ads, making a list, cutting coupons, and actually grocery shopping.

And so on and so forth.

I was single long enough, that I can recognize that this wouldn't have been all that busy as a single girl.

But somehow, when you toss into the mix that I spend some of those precious minutes actually talking to him, asking about his day or telling him about mine, those minutes become even scanter. Instead of grabbing a peanut butter and jelly sandwich to eat in front of the computer, we now have a discussion about dinner, and make something, usually with a side or two. And let's not forget there is now a cat demanding attention...and I still don't type quite as efficiently with a lap-warmer purring between me and the keyboard.

So now I fully understand why they wanted to hire their life away. I get it.

I've been broke for too long to want to hire a maid, a cook or someone to do my laundry.

So this is just a sneaky little way of saying thank-you to him for being my teammate. For doing all of the dishes and most of the laundry. For doing some of the cooking and a bit of the grocery shopping. For always being in charge of the trash and the recycling. For looking the other way the nights the gym bag barely makes it in the door before it hits the floor. For stopping to get the headlight bulb for my car because you knew I wouldn't get around to it - and then changing it in the dark because this winter I am never actually at home in daylight.

Back in that business they wanted us to understand that in order to get ahead, you had to think like you were already ahead. If you were making six figures a year, wouldn't you hire someone to do your laundry?

It's taken me this long to figure out why that never seemed quite right. But I realized it this week. Of the three women I worked for, it was the one making six figures and living in a custom-made dream home that did her own laundry and kept her purse tidy enough on her own. Oh, and her husband had done most of the labor on that home, too.

Christmas Pickles

We went shopping last night, mainly to stock up for the long weekend, but also because we felt like we should have something special to eat on Christmas, even if it was just the two of us.

We picked up a few things that made me smile. Things that would make him raise his eyebrow as I put it in the cart, and I would just say "Pickles."

A magazine. A thorough waste of money. You can buy an entire book for that price, and the articles are rarely as interesting as the headlines promise. Plus, you can often get six months worth of the same magazine for the same price if you subscribe. I bought one anyway, and I called it a pickle.

Barbecue potato chips. I don't need them or the calories, but I like them and I wanted them and we bought them.

Movie rental. We own movies we don't watch. You can get movies for free from the library. There are movies on television. You can Hulu for free. Seeing him doubled-over laughing at "The Hangover" was worth even more then that $1 we spent on that movie at Redbox.

Aveda Hair Conditioner. I know, I could buy 15 bottles of Suave for the same price.

What are your pickles? Can you buy them with abandon?

I used money I have - money I didn't spend on Christmas. I will use and enjoy each of the items I bought, but I still feel guilty.

I didn't need a movie and a magazine, for example. And the barbecue chips? They won't be gone before Christmas is over, and I will be wanting to diet and here will be these chips. I shouldn't have gotten them. Maybe I should take them back?

Clearly, I still have a ways to go toward thinking unbroke.

The Hunt for Savings

When I grew up, my father managed a cattle ranch, in New England. Like many "ranches" in New England in the 80's and 90's, this was, at heart, a tax write-off for someone with too much money.

The "someone with too much money," in this case, was two brothers, who owned a successful business and then owned the cattle ranch. They were older, they were not raised on a ranch, but they enjoyed "working" on the ranch. Despite being the person who signed the paychecks, they would do anything, and they were smart enough to know that, since they were not actually ranch-hands, they needed to bow to the experience and knowledge of their employees. This meant they spent a lot of time on pretty "low-level" projects - painting, raking, running to the store.

It was a bit of joke, for much of my childhood, that is these two brothers got a bit too underfoot, we could send them to the store and they would be gone all day. This is because, send them out for a roll of masking tape, and they would go to every store in a 20 mile radius that might possibly have masking tape, and check prices. They would haggle if needed, and, nine times out of ten, they would return with a case of masking tape, not a roll, because it was "such a good deal."

They didn't need to save the 29 cents, I assure you. Nor were they just trying to slack off and avoid coming back to the ranch. They were, quite simply, hunting for savings. They believed that you needed to get the best deal on every item, and they were proud to get a bargain.

They didn't NEED the bargain. They wanted it.

At my most broke moments, I often had these "out-of-body" experiences, where I could SEE that I needed to be more like them, but I could never control myself enough to make myself do it.

You see, when you are broke, the last thing you want to do is look for a bargain. Haggle? Oh no, "I don't want them to think I can't afford it." Go to the store that has the masking tape 29 cents cheaper? Absurd! "I am so broke that what is another 29 cents?"

I had items to be returned that I didn't want to return because the cashier would surely think I was being silly wasting my time for $10. Nevermind that I could have eaten for several days on that $10.

Eventually, I got better at pointing out when an item rang up incorrectly, or returning items that I didn't want or need.

It wasn't until after I was out of debt, and actually putting quite a bit of money into savings each month, that I was willing to post items to Craigslist to sell. Mainly items I had held on to throughout being broke.

I look at the grocery store ads each week and take advantage of price matching to get the lowest prices without actually driving all over town. Using coupons and looking at ads was something else I didn't do until long after I was out of debt.

Currently, I am on month four in a standoff with the hospital over a $5.98 charge for something that never happened. (They want to charge me for having blood taken, but no blood was taken. No blood work was done. No blood work was ordered. I refuse to pay. Purely on principal.)

I've never gotten comfortable, though, at haggling just for the fun of it.

I live with a man who will research every purchase to death, watching the price for sales or discounts, reading reviews and comparing products. He will go to the store to look at/touch/ fiddle with every piece of electronic equipment and every tool 15 times before he purchases it. He has been shopping for a new used bicycle for at least 18 months, without every purchasing anything. Not because he doesn't want it, but he knows exactly what he wants, and he knows exactly how much its worth, and he wants to spend about 40% less then what its worth! So he will wait.

I can't do that. I can talk myself OUT of buying something. That part is easy. I can now buy something, feel guilty and return it. I can tell myself I don't "need" something and refuse to learn anything about it.

As I learn to act like an unbroke person, as I learn that I can once again afford pickles, I think back to the two owners of the farm, and their all-day journey for masking tape. When I am on the phone with the hospital for my monthly explanation as to why I am not paying $5.98 for something that didn't happen, I have a feeling they are smiling down at me.

Car Depreciation

Source: How Fast Does A New Car Lose Value

To Borrow or Not to Borrow. . .

An interesting discussion around our house today, involving car loans.

First, let me say that "pre" broke I was average person and looked on car loans as "normal." I purchased a brand new vehicle in the fall of 2002 and assumed I would pay on that loan for five years and then trade in the car for a new one. That was normal. That is, more or less, what my parents had always done. What most people always do.

Then, of course, when the "broke" days came, there was refinancing, which extended the loan a few more years. . .and there was a lot of reading about the "evils" of owing anyone money, and how car loans weren't always "normal."

Dave Ramsey preaches that you can go your entire life without making a car payment and those were words I took to heart. I read it so much and I absorbed it all and I never really questioned it.

Honestly, I didn't have a lot of options. With my new loan, my car wouldn't be paid off until 2010, and, after my bankruptcy I knew my auto loan interest rate would be cringe-worthy until 2016, at least.

So, I followed Dave's advice, I put every penny I could find toward my car, and I ended up paying it off early -- early from the original loan, not just the refinanced version. After that, well, it took me another year to start making those pretend car payments to myself, but eventually I got on board, and now part of my monthly savings deposit is earmarked as the new car fund.

Last year, I had some car trouble. A few small things - A leaking fuel filter that led me to think my gas mileage was going away until it was discovered. The need for an anti-freeze flush led me to several months with no heat until after I was up to speed on the highway.

Then, a leaking intake gasket was discovered and quoted at high dollar prices.

I got worried. I thought: It's time for a new car. I have the choice now, do I trade it in for something that might not be any better, but which would leave me with no car payment? Do I fall back into the world of car payments? Do I use my small "new car fund" to repair this one and hope it lasts?

I wanted to do what I knew Dave would tell us to do. But I really didn't want to drive a beater!

In the end, I went with option number three, made the repairs, and was once again in love with my trusty car.

Then it got hit. I came out of the house one morning to find someone had backed into it's side and I could not even open the driver-side door. Insurance took care of the damage (less my high-deductible). The next month, my new policy came, with a 60% increase in annual premiums, thanks to that hit-and-run.

I got angry and I got worried at the same time. I didn't want to pay that much for stupid insurance, but every stupid auto insurance agency had the same rates. I had a recent claim, after all.

I made the decision to get rid of my comprehensive coverage. I saved myself a few hundred dollars, and I just have to take a deep breath and recognize that, should another accident happen, with no other driver to blame, I have to repair the car myself, or scrap it and buy another.

So, coming from this perspective, but having had good luck with the car for about a year (including my epic road trip from Omaha to Maine and back again, where my baby averaged nearly 25mpg), I commented today that I had hopes this car would last me until I had enough saved for a "nice" car, so I wouldn't have to fret about buying a questionable car versus having a payment.

Well, wasn't I floored?

He says, "I don't think I would ever want to pay for a car up front. I mean, what would happen if you got in a wreck and totalled it that first week? You'd be out all that money."

What???

Insurance will still pay the value of the car.

"But the value of the car dropped the moment you bought it, so it's not going to pay it all back. You'd be out some."

Same thing on a loan though...you would just owe the loan company and not have a car. Right?

This led to a bit of a debate by two people who weren't overly informed on the subject, which led me to read about gap coverage (which is optional in most states, by the way, and not something that's automatically included).

(It also led me to this interesting article regarding "diminished value" resulting from a car accident....one more thing I had never thought about.)

I found this article over at Bankrate, regarding auto depreciation but since its from 2002, it's not the most timely article.

This graphic from Edmunds was more timely, although it still doesn't answer the question swirling in my mind: How Fast Does A New Car Lose Value

Then, I finally found this article, Drive a (Nearly) New Car for (Almost) Free

Which I think backs up the point that was in my mind that I couldn't just say because I didn't want to be wrong.

If I buy a car that is one or two years old, (paying cash), and its a decent, low-mileage car, there will not BE the immediate drop off in value, and, even if I hit a deer leaving the parking lot after signing the papers, I will not be out the 10-20% of the value, as I would be if I had purchased a new car, with an auto loan.

Phew!

(No one tell him how much he made me think, with this one!)

Evolution of A Pizza Order

When your parents are paying: "Extra Large, 5 toppings, and a side of bread sticks and some wings, and 2 liters of Pepsi."

College: Party Special, 2 extra large, a side of wings and two 2 liters of soda, split 5 ways.

After your first job: A large, 3 topping, with a salad and a drink. Delivered.

When your first discover that you're broke: "Have you seen how much delivery is?!? I will go pick it up!"

Next time: "and no drinks! They are crazy expensive!"

When the creditors are starting to wake you up in the mornings: "We can only get pizza on Mondays, when they run their special, and I found this coupon, too."

When you realize exactly how broke you are: "Wow, Papa Murphy's is much less expensive, and I can cook that at home just fine. It's really no longer then waiting for take out."

Followed quickly by: "WOW! I can get a pizza just like at Papa Murphy's at the grocery store, and it's only $5!"

Until, eventually, you reach: "NO PIZZA!"

When you discover your get-out-of-debt guru (Dave Ramsey, Suze Orman, Larry Winget, etc): "We can make our own pizza. I found these crusts at the grocery store, and this pizza sauce. Buy some cheese and pepperoni, this will be good!"

When you really get in the groove of a get-out-of-debt plan: "I'm going to MAKE a crust, using Bisquick. This will be so much better! And we're just going to use some pasta sauce, not buy that little packet of pizza sauce."

When you're getting unbroke: "I know it won't be nearly as good, but I think I'm just going to pick up a grocery store pizza tonight."

We've been enjoying homemade pizzas for a while now. This summer we even got pretty good with grilled pizza. We do pesto and chicken, and burger and cheese, and peppers and mushroom, and, my personal favorite, smoked mozzarella and basil.

We love our homemade pizza. . .even if there are times I have to question how much I am saving on ingredients, compared to those $5 pizzas!

But tonight I was out and running errands and already at the grocery store and I knew I hadn't taken anything out for dinner, and sure, we could have made do, but man that pre-made pizza looked good.

So I bought it, and we enjoyed it, even if I felt a little guilty. Its just really nice to know we have enough room in the budget to get groceries and get pizza and not be juggling bills to make it happen!

Homesteading

I tend to be a bit of a lecturer. And I am a bit of a geek.

So if you know me, there's a good chance you've heard me give a bit of a lecture. And there's an even better chance that whatever topic I was expounding upon was geeky.

For example, every time I have occasion to look west across open prairie, or see an old wagon or homestead, or even hear someone discuss not having enough space, my mind wanders to the same place. Every time.

I think, just imagine what it was like for the original settlers of this land! You have to change a few words to fit if you consider "this land" the East Coast, the Midwest, the West, or another country altogether. And if you think of Native Americans as the original settlers you'll have to change a few more words, but it still rings true.

For me, today, I am thinking of the white settlers to Nebraska and Iowa. I am thinking of whole families traveling west in a covered wagon. I am recognizing that, having SEEN those wagons in museums time and again, that they were often no bigger then the closets showcased on "House Hunters" (you know the ones, where the wife says "I suppose this is enough. You can use the hall closet.")

Into that wagon went every item that FAMILY owned. Family. Often three generations. Not just clothing and entertainment, but furniture, tools, cookware, bedding, medicine, food. Guns and ammunition. Any supplies they might need. They would not be able to stop at Home Depot when they got to the new homestead, they had to have every nail they needed in that wagon.

When I see women needing entire closets for just their shoes, or I see men needing a five-car garage (no cars allowed), I think about the families packing those wagons. As I stand in our kitchen and count the "convenience" appliances, I think about the women who cooked every meal at home, with one pot, one pan and no refrigerator. Even as I try to deplete my book collection to an amount that will fit in just one bookcase, I imagine how many books would have been priority enough to squeeze into that wagon.

I look at my desk. You know, I haven't bought a pen, a pencil or a bit of notepaper in over 5 years, but I still have an overflowing pen and pencil cup on my desk, and a large bin of notepads (and I really do try to waste them). I have five calculators and three staplers, and two boxes of staples I bought when the office supply store in Westfield was going out of business in 1995. (You'd be surprised how little the average household uses staples.) Probably wouldn't bring this in the wagon. . . wonder why I can't part with it now?

I don't know if the social gluttony we see today came because we wanted more, more more, and that's led to the debt, or if the debt came first and led to the gluttony.

After all, your wagon breaks a wheel, and you go into debt to buy one, then you need to have more land to grow more crops to pay off the debt, then when they come out with the "automatic" corn planter you need that for all your land, and then you need an extra horse to pull the larger equipment and then, and then, and then.

I see that happening today, still.

You want the cell phone because its so much more convenient then just a house phone, especially on your long commute. Once you have a cell phone, you think a "smart phone" sounds pretty neat, what with its ability to check your email for you, so you can keep on top of work even when you're in the elevator on your way from the office to your board meeting. And since you have the smart phone already, you might as well enable the GPS option. That will be handy if you ever take that vacation you've been dreaming of. Next thing you know, you really need more text messages, because that's really the only way you communicate with friends and family anymore (it is so rude to talk on your phone in the elevator. Texting is more polite). And since you're now using apps on your phone to keep track of your to-do list, your grocery list, your upcoming doctors appointments, to track your calorie intake and your spending and even your mood and sleep patterns, well, clearly you need more bandwidth. Your phone takes a lot of abuse, so you head out to get the brand new phone, and you could get the free one but this $300 phone will be much more convenient, and your $200 a month plan seems totally worth it.
Until you remember that it used to be a $20 month bill and you used to actually talk into it.

BUT the new phone is also an MP3 player, so you need a docking station with speakers. Just like you really need the GPS dock for your car so you can display it on your dashboard. Not to mention the bluetooth headset. And since you're already paying for that much bandwidth, it only made sense to buy the netbook that would connect to your phone to connect to the Internet that way. And the colored carrying case defines who you are and makes you stand out in a crowd.

And, and and.

I wonder sometimes if I could survive if my next move was done, along with seven of my closest family members, in a wagon.

Interesting Christmas Ideas

Financially Fit No-Cost Christmas Ideas

Out-of-Body Spending

Let me tell you about Festus.

Part Siamese and part Banshee, he may, in fact, be the world's loudest cat. Although he now weighs a mere 17 pounds, when I first met him he tipped the scales at 22 pounds.

There are times you would swear he thinks he is a dog. There are times you would swear he was just an innocent toddler. There are many, many times you would think a portal to another dimension had opened and he was battling demons no one else can see.

He is NOT my cat. He's his cat. They are, unfortunately, a bit of a package deal.

Festus' favorite evening activity is "jungle cat." This is when he hides behind a house plant, and, just when you've forgotten he's there, leaps out, shrieking, and runs into the other room. Moments later, he will slink back in, and chew on said house plant until his energy has been restored for another round of jungle cat.

For exercise, he does a lot of standing jumps. As I am only 4'10" tall, I can assure you that Festus has no trouble completing a 4' standing leap, generally in a door way that I am about to walk through.

I repeat, he is NOT my cat.

Being a farm girl, I was sort of raised to believe animals were supposed to have a purpose. Being broke most of my adult life, I only ever saw the expense of pets. Food, vet bills, toys, litter, apartment pet deposits, rug shampoo, furniture de-hair-ers. You name it.

So, Festus had one endearing quality, from the first time I met him.

He doesn't play with cat toys. Ever. He likes crumbled receipts - he will play with the same one for days. Straw wrappers? They'll keep him up all night. His ability to focus in on a bit of lint and attack it, relentless, for hours, is one of his best features.

There is absolutely no need, ever, to buy this cat anything but food and litter. Ever.

So explain to me why, three years ago, when we'd been together only a few months, and I was working hard to pay off my auto loan and my parent's loan and had all that "gazelle intensity" that Dave Ramsey speaks about, I found myself in the pet aisle of the grocery store?

I didn't like the cat. Even if I did like the cat, I already knew he didn't need anything. In fact, he HAD toys that sat ignored.

I had $20 in my pocket and wanted 1 week's of groceries.

So why was I picking up little stuffed mice and eyeing scratching posts?

Why was I having to talk myself out of spending half my grocery money on a Christmas present for a cat I wasn't even completely sure was from this dimension?!?

It's a phenomenon I call "out-of-body spending." You let your guard down for just a moment and suddenly you're buying something you not only didn't need, but didn't even want.

When I first got out of debt, there was a month of two of this out of body spending. Then a month of "I'm in debt again and need to get back on track." Then a month of spending....and, well, you get the idea.

One reason I now write to you daily is because if I know I have to write something, and I don't want that something to be "I'm back in debt and starting over again," then I need to keep the collection of fuzzy mice to a minimum.

It's only $2 a day

I joined a gym.

I know. You can get fit without a gym. You can do sit-ups at home. Goodwill is always overflowing with used exercise DVDs, and the library has them, too. You can walk or run or jump rope, all for free.

I know all that but I joined a gym anyway.

Not only that, I joined an expensive gym. It's not the cheapest gym in town, its not the average priced national chain. In fact, it is twice as much as the national chain.

And I still joined the gym.

I thought about it long and hard, first. After all, its a monthly bill....an unnecessary monthly bill, which is something I spent five years eliminating.

This summer, I signed up for the free week at the national chain. After work that first day I ran home, changed into "workout clothes" and sneakers and hopped back in the car and over to the gym. I was going to try out a Zumba class and see what I thought.

I was at the gym in just a few minutes, shortly before 5pm. Well ahead of the 5:30pm class, because I wanted time to check out the gym.
Well, I should say, I was in the gym parking lot shortly before 5pm. The small, V-shaped parking lot. Along with about a dozen other people.

We drove slowly, turning at the narrow corner, and back down the other lane, desperately seeking parking spots.

Visions of college flashed before me. I needed a gym buddy...someone to get out and play traffic cone because, there....THERE! Over there....there was a spot, but all these cars are in my way and that...that Be*otch in the over-priced car her daddy bought her just stole MY SPOT.

I drove around the parking lot. Slowly. I saw others get spots and head into the gym, but 45 minutes later, the Zumba class had started, and my car didn't make the turn, but instead continued on out of the parking lot and headed back home.

When I walked in the door, he looked up, expectantly. "What did you think?"

"I think I am never joining a gym. Ever. What a waste of money! I would NEVER go, because it is WAY too much hassle!"

It was 3 months before I decided to check out this expensive gym. The expensive gym with the free parking garage. The expensive gym that is literally on my way to work. With classes before work, and also classes at 4:45pm (which is pretty much perfect since I get off work at 4:30, three blocks way).

It only took me a week to decide to join the gym. Every month when I write the membership check, I cringe, I admit, even though the money is "in my budget" and basically was the money from the storage unit I gave up (story for another day, as to why I had a storage unit.)

There's some hidden benefits, too, that make it SO worth the money. Oh, there's the whole "getting in shape" thing. Whoo-hoo. Whatever.

But, as winter has descended upon Omaha, and our tiny, fairly uninsulated house is kept at 62 degrees, going to the gym in the morning allows me to shower and change in a room warm enough to be considered humane. No goosebumps for this girl!

And, the gym provides hair dryers. Hair dryers that plug in, in front of mirrors, in the well-lit locker room. Compared to our tiny bathroom with no outlets, this is also a HUGE bonus.

At the gym, there are 12 televisions, all in a row, each on a different channel. When you use the cardio equipment, you plug your headset in and choose which channel you want to listen to. Now that we've given up cable television, I can still get my fix of HGTV, Style, E!, and several other mind-numbing channels. While he sits home going through channel-surfing withdrawal, I am actually listening to HGTV while watching Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team. Tell me that's not a bonus!

And don't even get me started on the sauna. Or the staff massage therapist.

So I joined a gym. Its a really big pickle, you might say.

But what makes this totally acceptable, in an unbroke sort of way, is that I use the gym. Daily. Sometimes twice daily.

Christmas for the Unbroke

In October, I spent a lot of money.

A lot of money.

I drove east from Omaha and I didn't stop until I hit the ocean.
I ate well on my trip.
I purchased presents for friends I would see, and I bought a new outfit to attend a wedding.
I stopped at three outlet malls and several Targets.
I bought new winter boats at the Bass Outlet, and spent more on one pan at the Le Creuset outlet then I spent on possibly every other kitchen item I own, combined.

I spent a lot of money.

While I was gone, he bought himself some new tools. And a few other new tools. (He did have nearly two weeks of solitude with Lowes, Home Depot and Menards all calling his name.) He spent too much on a my birthday present, as well.

However, all this money is not debt. Nor was it even "unplanned." We both spent our money in cash, and had no credit card bill hangovers. My money came from my savings - money earmarked for "travel" and "gifts" and "housewares".

So I know I shouldn't feel guilty about spending a lot of money.

However, I spent the last five years learning to be frugal. Learning "10 ways to save money today" and "Hidden ways to save $100" and "Travel on a dime" and to make do with what I had, to recycle, to buy used home goods and get by with less. Regardless of how much I tell myself that is WHY the money was set aside, the frugal part of me shakes her head:

"That money for travel was set aside for travel. Fuel. Airline tickets. Not so that you could by a pan at an overpriced outlet store. Did you even shop around? No. How can you say it was a planned purchase when you had no idea to buy it before you walked in there? You only went in because you were waiting for Crate and Barrel to open!"

The frugal part of me is not happy.

He's the same way. He might have had the money, but he knows he didn't NEED to spend it.

So we made an agreement, the day I got home from my vacation. As we unloaded a fully packed SUV and filled our basement with bags and purchases and wondered how we would fit all of this into our home.

No Christmas presents.

Seemed like a good idea at the time. We had each just given ourselves everything we might want.

It still seems like a good idea, except for one tiny problem.

I have money budgeted for Christmas.

I have money budgeted for Christmas, that I now won't spend.

I'll spend SOME of my money, obviously. Christmas cards are in the mail, and gifts for extended family are purchased. There are still potlucks at work and cookies for Girls Night and all the little holiday expenses.

But the money budgeted for him is just sitting there.

It has me thinking.

When I was broke --BROKE -- my loved ones learned not to expect from me for the holidays. "No gifts from Teresa, she can hardly afford postage." My family sent me checks because it was what I needed, anyway. I avoided exchanging gifts with friends because I really didn't have the money, and they understood.
So now I have this money and I think, "should I use it to buy gifts for people I normally don't?"
But I listen to the Christmas card discussion at work, and how many people "only send to people I get them from, because I feel guilty" and I think about how many of my friends now have families to buy for, and I won't add to their holiday stress by leading them to believe they need to send me something, too.

The frugal part of me is going "You should move that money into the travel fund to reimburse yourself for that silly pan!" (Her arms are crossed and she's making what he calls the "tiny mouth" - a sure sign of disapproval.)

The part of me that educated herself on all things financial is begging the rest of me to put the money toward the mortgage, or put it into my ROTH IRA (since I just started that this year, its not maxed out for 2010.)

The happy-go-lucky side of me says "Spend it on something, anyway. That's what its there for."

The happy-go-lucky side is internally being beaten down right now just for typing that.

The broke part of me remembers the Christmases of the last few years. Wonders if I should donate that money, in return for all the times I read the advice of an expert who said you should always donate, no matter how little you have, and promised them mentally that someday I would donate, and would make up for that year.

Part of me wonders if I should roll it into next year's Christmas fund. Afterall, next year we might want something quite pricey. Like another pan from Le Creuset.

All this thinking is really quite tiring.

I think, had I never been broke, I would not have to worry over this so much. I think those who have never been broke probably just buy what they want to buy people (hopefully sticking to a budget of some sort), and don't worry about the money left over. They've never been taught that "every dollar must be spoken for" or that an "idle dollar is a wasted dollar."

I think part of the journey to unbroke, is to make peace with having a bit of unspent money; unassigned money.

Perhaps, given the nature of this blog, I should give out Christmas Pickles to everyone?

Savings Snowball

If you've been broke, or you are broke, there's a good chance you have heard of the "debt snowball." I think it's time to apply the theory to savings.

If you're not familiar with a debt snowball, or you've heard of it but never really understood it, here's the quickie version:

Generally, when you have consumer debt, you owe a lot of people various amounts of money, with various minimums and various interest rates. When you try to pay it off and you just send off money here or money there, its hard to see any "real" progress and you can get easily discouraged. You simply don't have the drive to get out of debt. In essence, you are hurling individual snowflakes at your creditors and its causing no reaction at all.

So, what every expert or advice giver pretty much on the planet would recommend is that you list all of your debts, your pay off amounts, your interest rates and your minimum payments. Then, put them in order, and pay the minimums to each one. ANY money you have left over, you pay only to the first creditors on the list. When that first creditor is completely paid off, you add its old minimum to the payment you're making to the second creditor...and so on and so forth until you're all paid off. You can think of it like a snowball rolling downhill, gaining size as you pay off various creditors.

The various experts differ as to WHAT order you put them in. Some say highest interest rate to lowest interest rate, others say smallest overall balance to highest. The idea being you will pay the least money overall if you pay higher interest rates off first. However, you will be most likely to stay motivated if you see results - by paying off low balances quickly.

For myself, I've found, not just in myself, but in my 4 or 5 years frequenting debt message boards and reading others stories, that when you first decide to pay off debt, and to focus intently on that goal, you will have several small balances. Really small. Then, you'll have a chunk of midsized balances, and probably one or two large balances.

In 2005, the first time I listed my debts, I had over $40,000 in debt averaging over 18% interest. I believe I had nine creditors. Of course, I owed Victoria Secret a whooping $14 and JC Penney another $23. I had several creditors (credit cards and doctors bills), with balances between $700 and $2,000, and I had one card with almost $20,000 owed.
When I focused, of course I was able to pay Victoria Secret her money that month, and to polish off JC Penney the next month. After that, it was on to those mid-sized debts, which I attacked in order of interest-rate.

When I read other's stories, I see this same pattern repeated over and over. Someone with $5000 in debt, and 3 of those creditors are owed less then $100 each. Pay those first, regardless of the interest rate. Save yourself time, worry, hassle. Stamps. Envelopes. Pen Ink. Whatever.


OK. A savings snowball.

Do you have a list of the things you want to buy, things you want to do, "when you have the money saved?"

I want a digital camera and I want new shoes. I want to SCUBA dive at the Great Barrier Reef and I want to see the Corn Palace. I would love a Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer and someday I will need a new car. One day I want to retire, and have a home somewhere they never see single-digit temperatures!

They are all on my list, and they will all cost different amounts and take me different amounts of time to save up for them. Also, just like my debts, there is a certain level of priority assigned to these things. I needed new shoes, for example, when the cold weather hit, whereas I want a digital camera, but didn't need one. A new car is, luckily, still a few years out, but when it's time, I will NEED a vehicle.

So, I've started a savings snowball. A little bit of money goes each month to lots of things on my list, but one thing I am focused on. "I can't go out to eat this week, because I want to buy new shoes."

Larger savings, like the car, or the retirement, are funded consistently, automatically. Kind of like minimums on that $20,000 credit card I once buried at the bottom of my list. But when I get there....when I have traveled and taken pictures with my digital camera to share with my friends, and when I have a Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer proudly taking up half my counter space (and never being used because it is too much effort to clean it), then I can look at my retirement fund and see how far I got without ever noticing.

Which seems like a pretty good deal, to me.

An empty grocery list

I looked through the food ads tonight. These are delivered every Wednesday, and generally it is quite the production to go through them.

I sit with notepad and pen in hand, and go through each ad, writing down anything I might want to buy, and how much it is advertised for at each store. I have a different piece of paper for each store, so that, when something is advertised at two stores, I can then cross off the store that has it cheapest. (OK, I admit it, I usually need a calculator, too, because I am never sure, off-hand, if 3 for $2 is a better deal then 3 for $5.)

Once I have gone through all the ads, I spread out all the little pieces of paper and I make up a menu for the week, using things I know I have on hand and the things on sale.

Then, I make up an actual grocery list of everything I need, and put the price & store for advertised items. I get a bag and put all the ads in it and my list, because No Frills will accept the advertised pricing from other stores.

Then, I go through coupons, and pull out any that are for items on my list, and any that "I should use because they are expiring." On my list, I put a C next to the items with a coupon.

Like I say, it's quite the production. It doesn't get any easier when I am at the store, trying to set things on the counter but having to keep together at the back those items with better pricing at other stores.

Every so often, though, a week like this one comes along.

Sure, we'll need a new loaf of bread before the week is over, since there's only a few slices left. And although we have plenty of lunch meat, I just used the last slice of cheese.

But in terms of dinner, I made a menu completely from items I have on hand. And in terms of the ads, I went through every one and wrote down nothing at all.

It's nice to skip the production of it all. It is even nicer to know I won't be spending much money at the grocery store this week.

Yet, somehow, whenever this happens, I feel guilty.

"I must have been in a mood when I went through the ads, surely there are deals in there. I should look through them again."

"I'm overlooking SOMETHING. I must be. He's probably out of . . . ."

I go in the kitchen and I open the pantry. I mentally go through the day.....breakfast items ? Yes, there's pudding cups for me and Nutri-Grain bars for him...plenty of both. Snacks? Yes, he has a large container of trail mix and I am still living off the apples I got in Massachusetts. Plus I there's grapes and Laughing Cow cheese in the fridge. Lunch? Well, you already said you needed bread, but, plenty of mayo and lunch meats. He still has chips left. A few cans of soup. There's frozen pulled pork left still.. . ."

I spend more time feeling wrong when there is nothing on the list then I do actually making the list other weeks! When the pantry turns up full, I start wandering the house. Laundry detergent and bleach. Paper towels and toilet papers and toothpaste and shampoos.

Certainly there is something I could buy?!?!?

MORE Free Money Grabbing?

I have only dim memories of signing up for a drawing from http://www.rightathome.com/, the website for the SC Johnson company....but apparently I won!

Came home today to a box filled with cleaning supplies. Pledge Multi-surface wipes and Windex wipes and who-all knows what else? I may not have to buy cleaning supplies for months!

Then, I noticed that the vitamin B brand I buy has a code on it, with instructions to sign up at the website. Well, I gathered all the bottles by this brand I have...which at the moment is quite a few since I have "almost empty" bottle and brand new, unopened bottles, and I entered all those codes. I earned myself a $5 coupon! Whoooo!

Let's see. . . If I don't make a point to this post, you will simply think I am bragging.

Back when I was dead broke, a lot of the advice I read, the opinions of "debt experts" (I always wondered how someone became an expert at being broke. Most of us want to become experts at savings) talked about how, once you started saving and started "giving every dollar an assignment" money would "flow" to you. If every penny you could find was going straight to your e-fund, you would "find" $20 in last winter's coat pocket and save $10 off your grocery bill.

I never wanted to believe it. It sounded a bit too freaky for me. More like, if you're LOOKING for money, you can start finding it. Where you left it. In your coat pocket.

But somehow its true. When you've scrimped and saved the money for the new computer you've been drooling over for six months and you go to the store, cash in hand, you'll inevitably find it on sale.

It's nice to think that by starting this blog, my eyes are now open again to the money that wants to flow towards me.

Free Money Grabbing

He said it so casually, I could have hit him.

"You know, if I DON'T put my pin in when I use my debit card, I get cash back. I guess."

He said this as he was typing in his pin.

"What?"

"Yea, the bank has some program where if you use your debit card like a credit card, they give you cash back. But I always use mine as a debit card..."

Seriously, violence nearly erupted at the Hy-Vee checkout counter.

It was like he didn't even know me. That he would say such a thing. You can be sure as soon as we got home I came immediately to the computer, logged in and read the details of his cash back program.

He was automatically enrolled, so he didn't have to sign up for anything. He has to use the card as a credit card - meaning sign his name instead of enter a pin, which doesn't seem all that taxing, to me. The amounts of the cash back vary from store to store and if the purchase is made online or in person. Once he has earned cash back he has to "request" it from his bank to be put into his account.

Overall, I would have to say if you have a program like this through your bank and you're not using it, you might be a bit of a moron.

The next day, I learned that my bank had a similar program. I have to sign up for mine, though, which I did, and I don't have to use it was a credit card (though I usually do, anyway.)

Then I got to thinking about my credit card. How it is a 2% cash back card on all purchases, all the time, no matter what. Which seems a bit simpler. But do I USE my credit card on all purchases, all the time, no matter what?

No.

Even though I could use it and immediately pay the credit card with my debit card and not have a balance on my card and still get 2% cash back.

So I guess that makes me a moron, too.

I'm going to work on that. It will be like getting a 2% raise in 2011. Plus, I won't have to call myself a moron anymore.

If you want to afford pickles, look at the "easy" opportunities for free money. I know why I don't use my credit card all the time for every purchase. Because its a credit card. The broke person in me is afraid of it. Afraid to use it. Afraid to log in and see a balance on it, even if its $40 from filling up with gas on the way home and I'm logging in to pay it and it resulted in $0.80 back into my pocket.

If you buy things online, check out www.mypoints.com, which gives you "points" based on dollars spent (or reading ads, etc). I, personally, don't buy a lot online (heck, during the "online store boom" I didn't buy a lot of anything from anywhere. I had no monies.) so I use the program mainly for the occasional airline ticket or hotel room, but I have still managed to get about $200 back in four years.

This time of year there are even more opportunities for free money.

I see a lot of stores giving free gift cards this year. Buy a $100 gift card for massages, and get a $20 gift card free? I have a good friend who regularly gets massages, and it seems to me that's 20% off. If she has the cash on hand, she should be treating herself to a gift card...and keep the free one, too! :) Restaurants around here are pushing this now, too. So far I haven't seen any I had to run out and buy, but if you have the money, and you KNOW you'll eat at or shop at a business giving away free gift cards, then treat yourself!

Also, make sure you're doing everything you can to maximize "cash back" offers. Sometimes the fine print is beyond comprehension, but its worth some time to review your options before you buy.

My bank card, for example, has 10% cash back on purchases over $200 at a local bike shop. So, if I was to buy a bicycle, it would be much wiser to use my debit card, not my 2% credit card. And because its tied to my bank, the money simply never leaves my account (I don't have to wait until I accrue a certain amount and then ask for my reward.)

There are other cards out there with cash back programs, of course. If you're looking at getting a new card for the rewards, read the fine print... Make sure you know when you earn cash back and when and how you can redeem the money. For example, I recently looked at a 5% cash back credit card...but you didn't earn rewards until after you spend $2000 that calendar year, and then your earnings were only redeemable once a year. Comparatively, on my 2% card, it is always 2%, and I have to request a check in $25 increments....so as soon as I roll over to $25.01 I am requesting my check!

The Biggest Loser

It's a late night for me tonight, because I was watching "The Biggest Loser." This was the episode where the final four competitors head home for six weeks, in the middle of which they take the time to run a marathon.

A lot of times, when I was broke and trying to pretend I wasn't bankrupt, I would compare budgeting and spending plans to dieting and eating plans. Cut a few things out here and there and small changes will add up. We all know HOW to lose weight, or HOW to save money, its just the doing that trips us up.

A lot of times, when I was firmly on my budget and just trudging along trying to get out of debt, I would compare shrinking credit card debts to shrinking waistlines. There comes a point, where you've done everything you can, and all that is left is to wait. There's no amount of money you can't spend to day to be debt-free tomorrow and there's no amount of calories you can avoid today to be 50 lbs lighter tomorrow.

Tonight, as I watched "The Biggest Loser," I thought it was an appropriate reminder of why I've decided to start this blog, and to once again record my journey.

Here are people who had hit rock bottom. How they got there doesn't even matter - just as, in my opinion, WHY a person is broke doesn't make all that much difference at the end of the day. They had hit rock bottom and they had to learn to carry out the actions to dig themselves out. They had to cut out unneeded, unhealthy calories just as I had to cut out unneeded unhealthy spending. They had to get up, every day, and hold themselves accountable, just as I had to. At the end of the day, they weighed in, and they just hoped all the small changes on the scale would add up to a big change, just as every time I could consolidate a loan, or pay off a debt, I hoped it would some day add up to me being debt free.

Now, tonight, I saw these people head home. They had all the skills. Now they were in the real world. Would they go hog wild and eat five pizzas for dinner every night? Ice cream by the gallon? Would they decide that taking the time to weigh in wasn't needed since they "knew they were doing things right?"

No. They would continue to work toward that goal, and more, they pushed themselves to run a marathon.

Somehow it clicked for me and the feelings behind this very blog.

There are goals in my financial future that will be my marathons.

There are small, every day temptations of things to purchase (hello, Black Friday, Cyber Monday, Cyber Week, December, Christmas, post-holiday close-outs, year-end blow-outs, new year must-buys......Ahhhhh!), that will do just as much damage as pizza and ice cream.

So I hope, with the writing of these words, I will be accountable. And maybe, by sharing a few things I have learned, remind myself of where I have been.

Honey, Please Pass The Fork

It's interesting how much you can learn to make do with. . . or should I say, "make do without," when you are truly and utterly broke.

At one point, this household of two had two spoons, three forks and seven butter knives. Two of those forks only had three tines and in my opinion should not be referred to as forks at all. Leaving us with one worthwhile fork.

Be glad you didn't know us then, because invites for dinner included a note to "BYOF" (Bring Your Own Fork).

Once we learned to live with it, though, it didn't seem so weird. You eat, you wash the fork, you pass it off to the next user. You pray that they also wash when THEY are done, otherwise it becomes a little like cleaning the lint vent on the dryer -- somehow I always have to do it before and after use!

If you're living in a mentality of "I have my budgeted spending and savings and every penny is spoken for," you will never have a penny left over to splurge on a second fork. After all, a fork isn't an "emergency." Ever.

Silverware, then, was another "pickle" around our household.

Once the decision was made to buy a fork, we didn't want to just run to Goodwill or a yard sale and buy "a fork." There's nothing wrong with that, and its what I would have done when I was broke.

But living the unbroke, pickle-eating lives that we are now, we could set aside a bit of money here and there, and then, when it was on sale, head out and purchase some actual silverware.

I can now proudly tell you that I own 12 forks, 12 each of tablespoons and teaspoons and salad forks and knives. And a funny little "spreading" knife and a really big spoon and salad fork. . .

It's an exciting world I inhabit.

As you transition from broke, to unbroke, make your self a list of everything you want or need or already have but don't like and want to replace. You don't need to buy it all at once (I don't want anyone to end up back at broke.). Just remember that you can, and you should.

If you're like me, you're coming out of a few years of living only with "the crap no one wants" ~ the stuff that didn't sell at the yard sale, even for a quarter! It's time to slowly, steadily, replace it with items you want. (Just remember to REPLACE..as in, actually get rid of the stuff you don't want.....all our old silverware went to Goodwill.....or else you'll need another house!)

Dave Ramsey, whose words I poured over at my darkest hour, teaches his listeners to "Live like no one else, so that tomorrow, you can live like no one else." Its a great phrase. The key is realizing that tomorrow is here.

Grow up and get a retirement plan

I know. You were totally broke and you didn't think contributing to a 401K should be at the top of your list. Especially in recent years, when the 401K's of the world were losing money, and the credit cards of the world were sticking you with ever increasing interest rates and penalties.

And you were right.

I've only just realized though, the next step. Once you ARE consumer debt free, you will never get ahead if you put your savings into your mattress, your closet or even your bank. Even my online savings account is now making a whooping 1% interest rate.

Recently, I decided to look into "financial planning," which sounds to me like something well beyond my limited means and something I picture Warren Buffet worrying about, not me.

This was a pretty scary proposition. I mean, I don't even qualify for a credit card from Target because of my bankruptcy....how could I possibly think a financial planner would care about me?

Coming from a journalism background, I decided to treat it like a research topic, and not take it personally. I figured financial planners probably offer initial consultations free-of-charge (they do.), and so even if I couldn't afford it, I might learn something.

Well, wasn't I shocked?

And wasn't I wishing I had gone to a financial planner several years ago?

I can now proudly say I am fully funding a ROTH IRA. I can now tell you with peace-of-mind that my old 401K from that job I haven't worked at in seven years is now transferred and back under my control. Oh, and is gaining, at least a little bit, instead of just paying out maintenance fees.

Most importantly, I can tell you that the cost of a financial planner is well within my means. Well within your means.

Different planners get paid in different methods. The planner I chose gets paid....lets say by my ROTH IRA. The firm that I send MY money to takes out a straight percentage, and a portion of THAT goes back to my planner. So, I never cut a check directly to my planner, and the percentage of my money that is going to fees is actually LESS then it is thru my 401K.

Some people would see that as a conflict of interest ("of course this person told you you need an investment account...that's how he gets paid!"). If you're like that, then there are planners who you DO pay directly, as an hourly rate or a yearly rate, etc.

An initial meeting with a planner takes about 30 minutes, and that alone is enough to draw you a clear picture of where you are. You bring with you to that meeting your budget and spending/saving habits, your fixed & variable expenses. Bring a pay stub so there's a clear idea of your pay, your taxes, your withholdings, etc. Then you let a professional, an outsider, give you advice. Things like "Why are you putting this much into a savings account that's making .01% and NOT paying your car off faster, when you're paying them 4.6%?!?"

Since that first meeting is free, and fairly quick, you can meet with 2 or 3 planners to find one you think meets your needs. Either way, I definitely recommend it.

For me, the process was fairly easy. I don't have children, so I am not worried about future college funds or whatnot, and I could be pretty selfish. Sock it all into retirement and retire to Fiji! :)

Well, a girl can dream, anyway.

Realizing it's time to think about getting ahead instead of getting by? Check out the many, many resources available through the Financial Planning Association.

And just because it's the government-sponsored site that my planner recommended to me, you can also check out www.choosetosave.org.

How I save to spend

This is a process that has taken me a few years to work out, but as I see "budgeting" becoming more and more en vogue, I think it bears writing down.

I don't have some big huge emergency fund that will cover all expenses for a determined amount of time. That idea, when I got to baby-step three was way too abstract for me, for one thing, and I never managed to put money into savings.

But, one day I noticed that my monthly renter's insurance, which was only $11/month, included a $3 "monthly service charge." Hmmm. So I called them and I said "if I paid this off for the rest of the year and went to annual payments, would that fee be included?" And I found out that no, it would not. So I could save $3/month, or $36/year, simply by paying $96 one time? Umm, that seemed like a good idea to me. This was late in the year, so I think I only had to pay about $30 to finish it off, and the $96 bill would come in January.

I did that and didn't give it another thought.

That November, work had a potluck, so I bought the ingredients to my infamous cheesy-ranchy-bacon potatoes, and spent over $20 on a side dish and had no leftovers. Hmm. Then my girl's night group also had a potluck. And I purchased Christmas cards...and stamps.
When December came, I was already in the hole.
Then came Christmas presents. Hmmm, and about three more potlucks.
Oh, and sometime in there, my auto insurance bill came, as did my car registration and taxes...and the statement for that $96 renter's insurance.
.
.
Visions of brokeness danced in my head that holiday season.

So, I started a savings plan. That first year it was $75/month, which would give me just enough to pay renters insurance, auto insurance and car registration the following December.

The next year, I added up how much I spent on the "holidays", divided by 12, and added that to my automatic savings withdrawal.

By 2010, I was putting 1/3 of my take-home pay into savings, and keeping an in depth Excel sheet of where it was going, not just those 4 items above, but also:
Travel
Car Maintenance
New Car
Gifts (not holidays)
New Clothes
Home Decor
Medical


I think what I discovered was there is very little I want to consider an emergency. I would never take money from my e-find to go on vacation, for example, so until I had money set aside FOR travel, I couldn't take a vacation!


I suspect, now, that perhaps I have denied myself a bit too much. After all, 1/3 of my money goes into savings automatically each month. Perhaps I could cut that back to 1/4 and eat all the pickles I want?

Budgeting for Pickles

I remember the day clearly.

I had purchased a beautiful pork roast (on sale), and I had just finished browning it (and filling the entire house with smoke. oops). I set it in the crock pot, along with various seasonings and dreamed of the pulled pork sandwiches I would be serving that afternoon.

I glanced around the kitchen....barbecue sauce was ready, along with buns and chips, and in the fridge I knew there was cheese and salads.

What was I missing?

You guessed it.

 PICKLES!

How could I serve pulled pork without pickles? I couldn't! Without thinking, I went to the store and bought some.

It wasn't until later that day, when the pickle-topped pork sandwiches were consumed, that I realized it had been over six years since I had purchased a jar of pickles.

Seriously.

You see, it was six years ago when a succession of bad decisions had left me with $40,000 in consumer debt and a $17,000 annual income and a budget that didn't cover necessities, let alone extras.

It was five years ago when I discovered that my largest credit card, carried since my high school days, was legally a "joint card" with my parents, and needed to be paid off (by said parents) before I could declare bankruptcy.

And it was several long years after that before I sent the final payment to mom and dad and could truly declare myself debt-free.

In those years, I learned to BUDGET. I learned to LIVE WITHIN MY MEANS.

Like so many people are today, I learned about David Ramsey and Suze Orman and the envelope system and snowballing debt and I visited message boards about being broke and I gave others advice about slashing budgets.

I had no cable TV or Internet in my home. I became good friends with the town librarian. I challenged myself to "not spend a single penny for the next two weeks" and I "forgot" to send gifts at the holidays.

I'm pretty darn good at living like a broke person.

But on that day, with pickle-topped pulled pork filling my belly, I realized I wanted MORE then to be a broke person.

It was time I became unbroke.

I wanted room in my budget for pickles and purchasing clothes and homegoods that were actually "new" and not just "new to me."

Well, after a month thinking that way.... I realized I had a credit card balance I couldn't pay off immediately, for the first time in four years.

And I knew I needed a middle ground.  Somewhere between buying nothing and buying whatever I thought I "deserved for all my years of sacrifice."

If you're a Dave Ramsey baby-stepper, you could say this is a blog about what happens after baby-step 3...when you've got to get back to living.