Ask Why

"Why" may be my favorite word.  I am a bit like a three-year-old that way.

At times, I am sure it was trying for my parents to be faced with a child who asked "Why?" to everything from "make your bed" and "clean your room" to "eat your vegetables" and "get out of the street."

Unlike most children, though, I have never outgrown the word, and still offer it up in just about every conversation.  You would think, then, that those around me would be quite used to getting an answer of "Why?" when they expected "That's cool!" or "That sucks!" or "You are so right!"

However, when he mentioned he wanted to buy the Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer that I have been looking at--okay, drooling over--for years, I don't think he was expecting my answer to be "Why?"

Don't get me wrong:  I want the Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer.   I am envious of each and every one I see at friend's and family's homes, sitting dusty on the counter.  I turn green with held-back envy each time I watch a bride open her brand new mixer and I cattily think to myself, "She's never baked a thing in her life!"

I can not walk past them in the store without stopping to look.  To run my fingers over them lovingly.

More than once, in my single years, I rationalized that since I live so far away, I could FAKE my own wedding, receive a Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer as a prize, and no one would be any the wiser.

Now, here I am presented with an opportunity to own one.  A legitimate opportunity, given that he never does anything half-way and now knows the pros and cons of every model offered, right down to the motor size and available attachments.  He has shopped other brands.   He knows which one he would get me, all I have to do it pull the trigger and say "yes, wonderful, perfect!  Buy it!  Let's go to the store right now!"

Instead, I say "why?"

He was dumbstruck.

I want one, yes.  However, the actual thought of buying one never really occurred to me.  Did I just want the gift that many of my friends received?  Did I want to belong to the Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer Owners Club?  That doesn't seem right.

We have a tiny kitchen at the moment, with limited counter space and no cupboard large enough to house a mixer that size.  So it would either spend its life taking up a good 50% of my counter or in the attic, out of sight, out of mind, where it would rarely get used because the hand-mixer would just be "easier."

Maybe I really did want one but I was hesitating because the situation now isn't ideal - in which case I should be saying "yes!" and know it would get used. Sometime.  If it gathers dust in the meantime, well, isn't that what happens to all Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixers?

I started having memories of my mother's stand mixer.  It wasn't a Kitchen-Aid.  It wasn't really even a stand mixer.  It was a combination stand mixer and hand mixer.   This seems pretty smart to me now.  I told him, if I get a combination unit, then I would gain a stand mixer, but I would be able to get rid of the hand-mixer!  (It's pretty obvious by now how much we love getting rid of things!)  

It was at that point that he revealed HIS hand-mixer, still in the box. (It was on the top shelf, so I never stood a chance of spying it.)  So we have two hand mixers.  Along with multiple stick blenders.

All the more reason not to get a Kitchen-Aid Mixer right now. 

Asking "why" is a tough step of budgeting.  Every time you spend money you have to ask why you're spending it, who you're spending it for.

I could fill pages on my thoughts of people who tell me I "should" get something or I "must" have that.

Recently I was told I needed a "smart" phone -- so that I would have unrestricted access to the Internet while at work.    Not a bad idea, except the reason that I don't have unrestricted access to the Internet while at work is that work does not want me to be on the Internet while at work.  They want me, ohhh, I don't know....working?    So the idea of spending money in order to do something that is going to tick off my employer seems like a doubly bad idea.

The helpful people telling me how much I need this that and the other thing actually remind me of hanging around a party with the under 25 crowd, and turning down a drink.  This was something I did regularly for the simple reason I can't stand the taste or smell of beer and have absolutely no desire to consume one (even the tricky ones described as "Chocolate").   The look on the face of my peer, who was usually half-drunk themselves and couldn't understand what taste had to do with anything, is the same look on the faces of people now when they find out I don't have specialized ring tones or GPS or unlimited everything.  The look that comes over them when I say I didn't see that show last night, and won't tune in next week either, because I no longer have cable.

As long as I keep asking "why," though, I hope I will safely incorporate pickles into my life. . .without bringing home the whole buffet.